I Will Squish You Like A Bug

Take note you dumb ass highly retarded drivers in my town. LEARN HOW TO FUCKING DRIVE OR I WILL SQUISH YOU LIKE A BUG, MY SUBURBAN WILL RUN OVER YOUR DUMB ASS, AND GOD WILL THANK ME FOR RIDDING THE WORLD OF SUCH A MASSIVE FUCKTARD DRIVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay I feel better now.

Along the squish like a bug lines. Kiddo had his first football game last night. He's never played football before, and they only had about 5 practices before his first game. (flag football league folks) Now Kiddo is built for football people. Picture a 9 year old boy, shaved head, almost 5 feet tall, and weighs 137 pounds. He is definatly his fathers son. Big BIG and HUGE!!!! Him and I are wearing the same size shoes almost. Any how back to football. All the kids are in and scrambling around. Nobody on our team has played football before. 9 out of the 10 kids on the other team have played for 3 years or more. (seems real fair huh??) Well our quarterback kept getting sacked (his flag pulled off) And when the other team snapped the ball, our kids just stood there (kiddo wasn't in to play yet) and then they tried to get the flag of the person the quarterback threw the ball too. But the QB had plenty of time to size up everyone and make a good throw.

Now enters Kiddo. He's standing there with a look like he would rather be somewhere else. The ball is snapped, kiddo charges straight for the QB and upsets the quarterback so bad he throws the ball to his DAD to his dad people!!!! I mean I would probably be intimidated if I seen that big hulk of a kid running at me too. I start cheering kiddo on, and go, "that's right son, you go get his flag every time!!!" Nobody told him to go after the QB, the coach just told him to go after the "guy with the ball" So....the other team had like 5 touchdowns and we had nothing. And then my baby Gigantor started charging their QB. Their QB then threw two interceptions, 3 incompletes, and threw the ball away a number of times. Kiddo STOPPED the other teams ball from going very far the rest of the game. Gave us a chance to run a couple touchdowns. For a child that has probably zero, not a little zero, but a big fat ZERO, athletic ability. I think we may have found his nitch.

We have another game tomorrow night, lets see what happens.

Oh and on a side note, he intimidated the other QB so much that they sent in a really big guy to be quarter back. hehehehe To bad it isn't tackle football. I'm sure kiddo would have most sacks of the season. lmaooooo

Happy Humpity Hump Day Everyone!!!!!!