My day as a Nutcase er...I mean in a Nutshell

What a day. What a day I say it again. *sigh* not a sad sigh, but one of "Thank God it's time for bed and the day is over" sigh
7:55 up to pee 5 minutes before alarm goes, off--feel jipped out of 5 more minutes sleep.
8:00 receive phone call (which son brought to me while on toilet) from electric company trying to track down my mom cuz they are going to turn off her electricity.
8-8:10 Explain that I had talked to electric company last week when I got back, and they said no problem, about payment, and would not shut off electricity.
8:11 receive call from mother, saying if she has to stay for 2-6 weeks more she needs some things (of course all the shit she needed sent I had already packed up for the move)
8:25 hang up with mom and receive call from the mother of the two children I watch after school. (she usually brings them down here for me to drop off on late start Wednesdays) she woke up late and was taking children to school herself.
8:35 legs have fallen asleep, because I have had so many phone calls, that I'm still on the toilet.
8:35 1/2 tear off toilet paper to wipe so I can get up
8:36 Phone rings. Electric company again, asking more questions.
8:41 finally get off of toilet
8:43 complain that there is a hole in my sock (was finally trying to get dressed)
8:50 another call from electric company finally everything has been straightened out.
8:56 call from Alekx saying it was nice we wouldn't have to worry about getting mom this weekend
9:10 should have left for school at 9 but was running late from all the phone calls. aaaaaaahhhhhhh
9:40 pull back up to house after dropping kiddo off
9:41 get call from someone asking about mom talked for about 20 minutes
10:01 got on computer to start reading blogs
10:40 receive call from Alekx saying that mom still might get out on Monday
10:41 talk to house elf on computer saying same thing
10:45 call mom ask her what the hell is going on, she said that she does have a staph infection, but if the wounds are infected then she has to stay on an iv, but if they are closed she can go with oral antibiotics
10:50 call back Alekx freaking, she says have to call me back, because customers are in there, continue reading blogs, and checking e-mail.
11:55 Alekx calls says she is definatly getting out on Monday ahhhhhhhhhh
11:55 1/2 realize they don't have the credit card needed for renting the u-haul
11:56 have small aneurysm
12:00 Gigantor calls asking if I need anything of him from lunch. Me--"get your ass home and help me" hehehehe
12:02 call mom saying "well I guess I don't have to send you that stuff, and which credit card should I over night to you" Mom---"what, nobody told me I could go yet"
12:05 call Alekx ask "what the hell"??
12:06 Gigantor gets home
12:10 Alekx calls, says she called nursing home back and yes mom is getting out on Monday
12:11 do up an envelope to over night
12;12 trip down the stairs on the way out
12:20 sit in post office line for 15 minutes to over night one stupid envelope that ends up costing 14 mother humping bucks!~!!!!
12:45 pull into McDonalds and get some lunch
1:20 get back home, crack up at Alekx's blog, then realized---wait, that's MY life!!!!
1:30-2 eat my oh so healthy lunch
2:20 leave for the school to get one of the 20 parking places they have so I can wait for the kids, and not be in the mess of 100 plus parents driving around last minute looking for a parking place
2:21 pick up my book to read---fall asleep
3:05 kiddo scares me awake with a big BOO and slaps window, I jump, lose place in book, and get angry all at the same time
3:10 still can't find the two kids I pick up
3:11 find the little girl
3:15 see the boy running past me, holler his name, he tells me he's going to a friends. ummmm I don't fricken think so buddy get your butt in the car. Now boy is mad at me
3:20 pull over to side of the road, threaten to spank boys ass if he keeps wrapping the shoestring thingie he has around his neck and tightening it.
3:25 scream at boy and kiddo for smacking the tar out of girl
3:30 pull into driveway, fuming at kids already
3:35 turn into satan because they are hitting each other instead of starting homework
3:40 all children nicely doing homework, trying to put the small fires my evil eyes started, out
4:10 everyone is done with homework
4:15 mom calls, talks to me for about 10 minutes, then wants to talk to kiddo.
4:20 praying kids dad will miraculously get off early and come get them.
4:30 give up on praying and kick kids out of house to play outside
4:45 kids come in being terrors, set them up with play dough to make Gigantor a birthday present
4:46 realize FUCK Gigantor's birthday is TOMORROW and I forgot. That is so not me people. I never forget. I felt like dog vomit, I felt so bad.
4:50 take huge avon order from my little old lady
5:15 kick kids back outside, try to clean up play dough mess
5:25 call D, Gigantor's best friend, ask him to come over tomorrow for dinner and cake
5:30 search cupboards for cake mix
5:35 franticly search checkbook for money for nice dinner Gigantor would love
5:45 get on computer to post the avon order I received
5:58 keep yelling at kids to turn knob on door harder that it's indeed not locked. Finally scream something hysterical and unintelligible. Kids father opens door and walks in.
5:59 dying of embarrassment
6:05 wave goodbye to kids and dad.
6:06 get call from Gigantor he just now got off work and went to feed mom's animals
6:30 heat up leftovers, get pissy about the state of the union address being on instead of LOST, watch a recorded program.
7:30 Gigantor asks if we really have to finish packing this weekend or was I kidding.
7:40 Gigantor asleep on couch, me ready for bed myself.
Now it's 9:45 and I'm going to go shower and go to bed. Tomorrow's another day people.