Blog Wars and Funnies

Well I had every intention of getting on and writing about Alekx's 1st wedding anniversary, since she wrote about me calling her when I got married. And don't get me wrong, I have every intention of still writing about it. But on the phone last night we got talking about something that happened shortly after I was married, and we couldn't stop laughing. So.....I'm gonna tell you all about that today instead.

Okay let me set the scene a little. First of all, my mother cursed me and Alekx with big very round cabooses. Even though Alekx has lost weight she still has the big round caboose. When they say "baby's got back" that was about us three. The "I like big butts" song was also about us three. Anywhoo....also when I was first married I was still living with my mom, cuz Gigantor was still in the Navy over in Virginia. Alekx was also living with us, she was saving money to get into a house. Well, me and Gigantor got married in April of course, from a justice of the peace in Virginia. I came home and started planning a big religious ceremony (wedding) In Sept. I went in for emergency surgery. I almost died. The incision on my lower abdomen was so big it looks like they had tried to saw my legs off. That was the last of Sept, first of Oct I was in the hospital. Gigantor got out of the navy and was staying at mom's with me till he got work and we got an apartment. Our wedding ceremony was November 13th. Anyhow....I was not allowed to bend or lift anything more than 1/2lb for 6 months, then nothing over a pound for a year. I was even out of work for 6 months. So....this one beautiful Sunday afternoon. We lazed around in bed for a while, then decided to get up and get busy. Since we had no money we didn't pay rent, but we did house work, yard work and cooking. So we are in the back bedroom (my room) and Gigantor goes, "okay I'm gonna go work on the weeds in the back yard" and he went out. I decided to be nice and go cook lunch (of course I didn't tell him I was going to do that) I go up to the kitchen to cook some lunch, and my mom was headed back to the back bathroom to do some scrubbing. Well out of the blue, mom decides to be really nice since I can't bend over. And she goes into our room, and decides to clean out and organize the bottom of our closet. So there is mom all the way in the closet with just her "big round" tookus hanging out of the thing. And Gigantor comes back in and walks into the bedroom. All Gigantor see's is this "big round" tookus (remember all of us have this booty) Now flash to me in the kitchen, working over the stove. I hear this god awful scream, and I hear mom yell "I'M NOT YOUR WIFE" and I hear giant running footsteps. BAM BAM BAM BAM running down the hall. Gigantor bursts into the kitchen beat red, grabs me in a giant hug and starts going. "OH MY GOD I'M SORRY I'M SORRY, I'M SO SORRY HONEY OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY" I'm panicked now going "WHAT WHAT WHAT??" My mom wonders down the hall, and is now pointing at Gigantor and laughing so hard she is doubled over. Gigantor has gone and hid behind me, and is still whimpering about how sorry he is. I finally scream and these two and go "WILL SOMEBODY JUST TELL ME WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED??" Gigantor starts going "no No NO NONONONONONONO!!!!" My mother through bouts of laughter, says "I'm sorry it's to good to not tell, I have to tell her" By this time I'm starting to giggle for all the laughter and from the intense discomfort my loving husband is in. I'm giggling and go "what already" and my mother proceeds to tell me that Gigantor grabbed her ass while she was in the closet. Not just a pinch, or one hand sorta grope. But it was two hands both cheeks massive grab here people. He walked back in the bedroom and thought that "big round" tookus was his wife's. And he was gonna get the groove on. hehehehee

Okay just thinking about this is making me crack up all over again. Gigantor must be one tough man to live with any dignity after something like that. Although nobody in the family will let him forget he did it. hehehehee

Have any of you grabbed your mother in laws butts?? I don't mean on purpose cuz they were cute. I mean purely by accident. hehehe

Okay now that I got that funny out of me. I may post about Alekx's 1st anniversary tomorrow.

Happy Tuesday everyone.