In the Bra, or Not in the Bra

That is the question. My vortex bra has not been on the attack since I have been here in Texas. No food, no bandaids, not pieces of cat food, no money, no small children running astray have been found in my bra. Is Texas a "non" vortex state??? I do think it is a "lets injure Burfica" state though. hehehehe My food was giving a gallent (sorry don't know how to spell that word) effort to find it's way into my bra today. I now have, wait let me count them, 8 spots on my shirt. That is just from lunch ladies and gents. 8 big reddish orangish spots on my boobies on my blue shirt. Of course I didn't change, that would take to much dam effort. And it would only mean my dinner would have to be that much messier to destroy the new shirt I put on. So...I choose to go around looking like I rolled in my food instead of ate it.

I wonder if when I get back to Arizona, if the suction of the bra will increase to make up for lost time. I would much rather suck in and carry around strange objects in my bra, than get hurt over and over again. hehehehe

Oh and did I mention I have cramps and am bitchy??? Well I do dammit. Alekx and the House Elf are gone to the lake again this weekend. Not only will I be extra careful so I don't get hurt, but I just may stay in bed all weekend. Wonder out long enough to feed the animals and my kid. hehehehe I will hopefully catch up on some sleep. Yeah yeah I know, I doubt it too, cuz I will sit in front of this dam computer most the night willing you all to blog and blog some more.

Okay I need to go, I need to get some water (still warding off that kidney infection) Happy Humping Hump day everyone!!!!

7 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!

Moanday

It's Moanday not Monday. hehehehe Moaning and groaning is present. Poor kiddo is trying to fight off a summer cold. He was swimming this morning and even told his instructor "I don't feel so well" Then he told me he was "really really tired" He's 9, he doesn't admit not feeling well or tiredness. Poor thing.

I made it through another weekend without hurting myself. yayyyyyyyy Alekx and the house elf leave next weekend again to the lake, so who knows. I may do one last big whammie before heading home. hehehehe Gosh I hope not. I'm gonna tape my ass to a chair the entire time they are gone and not move. Not let kiddo move either.

What's with the food network??? I watch it every day, for lack of anything else. And there are only so many cartoons I can take. Well they keep showing the same programs, over and over and over. I'm beginning to wonder if they have all run out of recipe's. That would suck.

Ladies?? Do any of you get the "blahs" right before you start your period?? I'm so blah, like tired but not, don't feel good but not. You know?? Just blah. No energy and stuff. oOOOoOo I just thought, bonus. At least the curse is this week, and not next week when I get to see Gigantor again. hehehehee Speaking of which.
9 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!!

Happy Moanday everyone!!! May you all not be blah :p

Lazy Friday

We have had a lazy day today. You need one of those every once in a while. To bad Alekx had to go to work. neiner neiner neiner. hehehehe I woke up about 9 but stayed around being lazy, and lightly dozing till 11. I haven't done that at all this summer. Even when I got really really hurt. I got up early. Kiddo slept in till about 8 which is really late for a 9 year old. He then wondered around in his tighty whiteys till around noon. When he then got dressed (very reluctantly) cuz I told him it was lunch time. We have done nothing of importance today. Watched t.v., played with some toys, hugged and kissed, and he told me some jokes. That has been our big big day.

Alekx wants us to go to the grocery store with her. I HATE grocery shopping, but I guess I should really go and be nice.

OMG I wanted to go buy the new Harry Potter book this weekend. My husband called me and says. "you are NOT allowed to buy anything for yourself other than hygiene products till you get home" Dammit all anyway. Now not only do I have to wait till I get home, but now I know what my fricken birthday present is. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Okay I'm gonna leave you with the joke kiddo made up today. Amazingly enough this one was cute and funny. (most of his are weird and make no sense) here goes. What happened when the donut got ran over by a car??? It got "creamed" hehehehehee (insert little boy giggles here)

12 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!

Have a good weekend everyone!!!

Wormy Things

Okay so you all know that I have had the grand tour of the inside of Texas's medical facilities since I have been here. Ambulance, two hospitals, 2 different clinics. Well...I had to visit a doctor yet again yesterday. ahhhhhhhhh Only it was not me this time. It was the kiddo. Let me give you the dish.

About a week after we got here and started swimming I noticed a red sore like thing on the back of his neck at his hair line. At first I thought OMG IT'S RINGWORM!!! Alekx says "no ringworm is round" I'm thinking well maybe not always. So...I decide to keep an eye on it. I mean it was the only spot he had, and when he would not be swimming for a few days it dried up alot. Well...then it came back worse after he got his hair cut again, so I thought maybe razor burn (we shave his head) After three weeks of this thing, I'm starting to get a little panicked. I'm thinking it's ringworm or infantigo (don't know how to spell that right people, bear with me) So I decide if it doesn't go away I will take him into the doctor when we get home.

Yesterday, we are driving to swimming lessons and kiddo goes "Aunt Alekx, I got a weird bump" I'm like "what are you talking about". He says " I got this red, flat like bump on my leg" I thought that sounded weird, so I made him show me. AHHHHHHH (this is where you run away) It was perfectly round with the broken skin and the white swirls in the middle. Looked exactly like the ring worm I got once in a while when I was a kid. So...we get him into the doctor. YUP!! ringworm. He gives us a prescription for a cream, and says he probably got it from our pets. I DON'T FRICKEN THINK SO!!! We have had pets all our life. I then mention the pool, and he says. Oh well he probably got it from the public pool, that is where most people contract it. GREAT!! We all go swimming and exercising in that pool, and there is nasty ringworm floating around. *shudder*

I take the prescription of cream to the pharmacy. They said my copay is 60 fricken dollars, and it cost almost 100 without the insurance. AHHHHHHHHHHHH So...we ask them to call the doctor and get another cream. I call back and the pharmacist, says "there is the same exact cream you can use, same strength and everything, and it's over the counter." I'm like "how much is that" he says "14.99 with a dollar of coupon" Whoooooohooooo So we run down there to get it, and guess what the cream is. It's Lotrimin. You know the athletes foot cream. Says it works on jock itch and ringworm too. The mother flubbin doctor wanted me to spend 100 bucks on a fancy name of lotrimin. AAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love my sissy, but dammit I am so tired of visiting all the doctors offices and pharmacies. LOL

I'm off to scratch my butt or whatever. hehehehe Happy Thursday all!!!

13 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!

Brain Cramp

I guess I'm having a brain cramp. I have sat here and sat here, and dammit I have nothing to talk about. So this is gonna be one of those posts where I have a whole lot of nothin to say. hehehehe

I think I'm way way homesick today. Even the countdown tool isn't helping me and kiddo today. I have loved my time here in Texas, and it has helped me get a jump start on alot of things. But I desperately long to be in my own bed, next to my hubby, sleeping in. Seeing my pets, and friends. Going to the lake. Just grilling everything under the sun. LOL

I am gonna miss this high speed internet though. I'm gonna go home and have to wait and wait and wait for all my pages to come up. hehehee

We are talking about maybe going to the dollar theater tomorrow. It's 50 cents all day long on Tuesdays. whooohoooo what a find huh??? I think it's a nice few hours to spend, and not to expensive. And if you go during the week and during the day, it's not that busy. Everybody is at work.

I will try to come up with something intelligent to say, if not at least something snarky. Sorry about the, so boring you slipped into a coma, post.

Happy Monday everyone

16 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!

Have you ever??

Washed your hair, put the deep conditioning on it, that you should leave in for 10 minutes, then forget to rinse??? As if that's not bad enough, not only do you not realize it before you get out of the shower. But you dry your hair, and not realize it, (now your towel is all goopy) Then you sit on the bed and run a comb through your hair and thing to yourself (boy that conditioner is working well, it's so easy to comb through my hair) You put your comb down not looking at it, but now it's all goopy too. You put your shirt on, and get the back bottom edge all goopy cuz you ran it over your hair. You lean back in a chair and get the back of it all goopy. People look at you weird. And the only time you finally realize it, is when you reach up to scratch your dam itchy as hell scalp!!!!!!! Then you are like WHAT THE HELL IS THAT IN MY HAIR???? It takes you a while of rubbing and sniffing to realize you DIDN'T RINSE THE FRICKEN DEEP CONDITIONER OUT OF YOUR FRICKEN HAIR!!!!!

Well have you all ever done that??? Or is it just me???

Happy Friday everyone!!! Have a good weekend

19 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR IS HERE!!!!

Baggy Leg Holes

I got baggy leg holes, and slipping straps. hehehehehehee I am literally falling out of my bathing suit.

I got a new bathing suit in May. One that fit perfectly. I got it just for doing water aerobics this summer. Well...I guess I'm determined to get better after my fall, and to work my butt off. Because...I put my suit on yesterday morning, and the straps were falling down. I was like "oh man it's a month old and all stretched out already. dammit!!" And Alekx is like, no I think it's cuz your losing weight. Well...I go to aerobics and as we are jogging in the water, the legs of the bathing suit were bugging me, so I reached down to feel. Each time I went up the legs of the bathing suit went up, and when I went down, they then went way down like and inch or more, and the butt of my bathing suit felt a little baggy. So...I was really thinking the thing had stretched out.

So...I get home and start to change, and I am pulling up my underwear. Well they just kept pulling up and up. I'm like dam they are above my pants (they have never been that high) then I realize that the leg holes are really baggy. So..then I was so excited that I called kiddo in to show him, I even dropped my drawers in front of Alekx to show her. I thought, "maybe I am losing some weight" Either that or Alekx is going out at night and buying exact duplicates of my clothes in a size bigger, to mess with my head. I wouldn't put it past her, we all know what a big stinker she can be. hehehehe

We were watching Boogeyman last night. Man we were all jumping. Alekx even screamed out a couple f words LOL The house elf and I were hiding behind a pillow looking over it. And at this one great big suspensful part, that we know something really scary is gonna happen, Alekx's rotty lets out the biggest loudest longest FART that I have heard in a long time. Right after he farts, the bird does this laughing. We were all rolling, then we ran out of the living room cuz the dog tried to kill us. hehehehe

We are off to the dollar theater to watch Kung Fu Hustle, see if it's any good.

Happy Wednesday everyone
21 MORE DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!

DAMMIT........

.....I smashed my thumb after water aerobics today. Ouch!!! I was trying to get out of the car, and it was slick cuz it was raining real hard. and I don't know how I did it, but I smashed my thumb in the hinge part of the car door. Made me almost pee my pants. hehehehe

One of Alekx's dogs, Casper, (yes he's white) is doing something odd all of a sudden. He always follows you around like he's being helpful. But here lately he has been following all the women around, then the minute we sit down, his nose shoves in our hoochi coo's. Just started it the last couple days. I'm in the bathroom peeing, and he shoved open the door and tried to do it. I chased him out of the bathroom. He does it to both me and Alekx. This past weekend our cousin and her husband came for a visit and he was doing it to her also. Dork dog. hehehehe

Yesterday was mom's birthday. She turned 60. We have to be thankful, cuz just a few months ago we never thought she would make it here. One blessed day at a time. We went and did a tiny party in the morning, with my cousins. Got her cupcakes and she opened 3 presents. Then we took her out to eat, and gave her the rest of her presents. She sure had a good time. Even though it's really hard to get her in the vehicle and get the wheel chair loaded up, and squish us in the back seat. It is still worth it to let her have some fun and not feel so cooped up.

I may be camped out in the bathtub though. The weather has been clouding up and even doing some raining. But people in this area have been talking about how it's time for some tornadoes. OH HELL NO....I'm gonna be living in the bathtub. hehehehehe

Okay I ran out of what to say, so I'm going to go see what you all have to say. hehehehe

22 DAYS TILL GIGANTOR GETS HERE!!!!!!

Meltdown

31 days.... that's the magic number. Apparently 31 days is how long a little 9 year old boy can handle being away from his daddy and his home. Cuz after 31 days. The poor little boy has a major major melt down. I don't mean the, crying, oh I miss everyone I want to go home kind of meltdown. I mean the screaming at the top of his lungs I HATE IT HERE, I HATE EVERYONE HERE, I HATE YOU FOR NOT TAKING ME HOME, I WANT TO GO TO DADDY, I WANT TO GO HOME, TAKE ME HOME NOW kind of screaming. Along with this screaming come's massive crying. Not just water works, but the crying so hard they are choking, and sobbing uncontrollably kind of crying. Then came the whimpering. In among the crying and screaming, he started whimpering, how he didn't feel good, he wanted daddy so he would feel better. Then came the puking....so we had screaming, crying, whimpering and puking going on. By this time I was crying, feeling his pain. Then he curled up on the bed in a fetal position and started begging me to let him go home, and just sobbing. All I could do is grab him and hold him tight, and make him hug me back real tight. I told him anytime, ANYTIME, he felt that homesick, he come to me and hug me so tight, and we would get through it together. Then we started a countdown. Gigantor will be flying here on the 27th. So...I told him we were over half way there. Only 27 more days, and he asked me to tell him each day how many more till he see's daddy. My poor baby was breaking my heart today. He is still rather icky feeling. He made me promise I would stay up with the t.v. on in my room till he was asleep. Our rooms are right next to each other. Actually the head of our beds would touch if there wasn't a wall there.

Anyhow, that was my exciting day. I will see how this weekend goes. Alekx and the house elf are gone again. No injuries would be nice. hehehehee My cousin (whom I haven't seen in about 25 years or more) is driving down with her husband, and will be here tomorrow sometime. I'm looking forward to that. They are coming to see us and mom for her birthday. It's on the 4th.

OOOOoOoO and a few of you finally did know that Dealey Plaza was where JFK got assassinated. It was an amazing place to visit. It had a very surreal feeling. Almost spooky. And everyone visiting was very very quiet, even the children. A piece of American history even if it wasn't a good thing.

Well all I need to go to bed, it's after midnight. Have a good weekend all, I will try to post this weekend.

My right ass cheek hurts!!!

Oh my gosh, my right ass cheek hurts. I've been working hard, and I have this permanent pain down my right ass cheek into my right thigh. hehehehee Alekx has no sympathy for me either. So....I didn't tell her when she was jumping right out of her bathing suit. She figured it out though when I kept smiling at her like a looney. I just kept smilin, and she finally looked down while we were doing the jumping and figured out what was going on. I actually got her laughing, and seen her turn sorta red. Dorko knows, it's almost impossible to embarrass Alekx. hehehehe

Sorry I hadn't posted since Monday. Been busy busy busy. We did water aerobics on Tues morning and Tues night, plus went to see mom. We did them again yesterday morning, then we went to a movie at the dollar theater. Then went and took mom for a ride, got some taco's and went and ate in her room. We came home and dinked around, and had dinner and watched a movie. We watched Napoleon Dynamite. OMG what a train wreck. It was so horrible you just couldn't look away. ahhhhhh
Today we did water aerobics this morning, and we would do them tonight, but we have a meeting to go to at the nursing home. I guess medicade is going to do a talk to tell you how you can possible keep your property. And mom would just get all confused and not know what was said, so Alekx and I are going to go.

Well since I'm so boring today, and my ass hurts, and Gigantor isn't here to rub it out, I'm gonna go and read everyone else. LOL

OooOO none of you told me if you knew what Dealey Plaza was, so I'll give you one last chance before I tell you where it was I visited last weekend.

Come on, I know somebody has to know this. I would think Op, Kitten, and Olives would know it for sure.

Happy Thursday all.

Stayin Alive

I am still alive and kicken. Didn't have to visit the hospital yesterday or nothing. whooooooo flippin hoooooooooo!!!! I did go to the bbq. Kiddo didn't like the ribs, and I thought that strange. Till I tasted one, and was like hmmmm, there is a peculiar taste to it. Well...the brother ran out of "honey" bbq sauce, and wanted to make it sweet. So...he added a jar of caramel ice cream topping to smokey bbq sauce. I think that is just about all I have to say on that. hehehehehe

I feel so funky today. I'm not "yawnie tired" but I feel like I could sleep for a week. And everything hurts and is crampy. I don't know the deal. It's not cuz it's that time of the month, cuz that was last week. LOL I just feel weird.. (okay well weirder than usual)

Alekx was so tired from coming in from the lake last night, that we didn't get up in time to do aerobics this morning (6 fricken 30 people!! in the summer) So we took kiddo to swimming lessons. We had signed him up for level 1 again, but he was doing so well that they put him in the beginning class of level 2, then moved him to the advanced class of level 2. So...that was cool. I think we are gonna hit aerobics twice tomorrow. morning and night. Then do that again on Thursday. We went and hung out at Alekx's work for a few, then I drove home. I will have to drive back and get her later. Maybe I should take a nap. LOL

On Saturday, we drove into Dallas. (the brother drove us) and we went sightseeing. We visited the Dealy Plaza. Anybody know what that is??? It was rather surreal, and very quiet. Not a lot of people talking or making noise. You felt a great respect from people there. I'll reveal what that is, if none of you get it, tomorrow. We then went to eat at this burger joint called Dicks. The entire theme at Dicks is for the wait staff to be rude, and to give everyone a hard time. You sit down, and the waitress comes over leaning on the table, tearing your placemat for her order pad. Going "what do you want" sorta rude. Then they come around and tie giant bib's on everyone. They make hats with rude sayings on them, and put them on some peoples heads. Kiddo got one that said "Sand box pimp" it was too funny. They also will blow balloons up with helium and tie them in peoples hair. It was just really funny, and festive. It was a fun time. We were so pooped out on Saturday night, we barely had energy to get some dinner and feed the animals and go to bed. HEY maybe that's why I feel so tired. LOL

Okay I'm gonna go watch a cooking show that is looking good. hehehehe
Happy Monkey Monday everyone!!!

Sunday

Well I made it to Sunday. But last time it was on a Sunday that I got hurt. And I was headed out to a bbq and the house Elf's brothers place. Guess where I'm going about noon thirty today?? That's right, we are going to try and bbq again. I am being so careful watching everywhere I walk, that I will probably walk into something high and poke an eye out or something. hehehehe Send "safe" vibes to me everyone. If I don't post tomorrow, then the curse is still here. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Still Here

One day down, two more to go. *peaks out from under covers* What unknown curses await me while they are gone???

I will defeat the dreaded curse of 2005!!!! I will dammit, I will!!!!
*hides back under covers*

All Alone

Alekx and the house elf went to the lake for the weekend again, left me and kiddo all alone. Do any of you think I will hurt myself this time??? How about the kiddo??? If we didn't have to eat, I wouldn't let us get out of bed the entire weekend. hehehehe

I'm so Dull

Man I'm so dull this past few days. I'm so dull I couldn't cut butter. hehehehe Seems like all my snarkyness has moved right on over to Alekx.

I didn't feel good yesterday. I slept long, and got up and didn't do much of anything, and god was I emotional. I cried to Gigantor for over a half hour. I don't know what was wrong with me. I think that I had just been pushing myself so hard everyday. Pushing myself right to the breaking point. Then I think I finally crossed that line, and plunged head first into the breaking point. I got sorta sick, was hurting really bad, and couldn't stop crying. So...I just took most of yesterday to rejuvenate, and then I felt much better this morning. Off and running again. Guess that's a good thing.

And man, I'm craving beef. Maybe I need some protein or something, but I sure am craving it bad. And not the "buy my a hamburger" beef, but the big juicy steak or big hunk of roast kind of beef. ahhhhhhh now I'm hungry, gonna go eat my banana.

Okay I ate my banana and I still want a steak. hehehehehe

Kiddo finished his first session of swimming lessons today. Man he is doing so good, trying so hard. He is swimming a little ways by himself, and he can float on his back by himself. Auntie Alekx already has him signed up for more lessons starting on Monday. My baby is gonna know how to swim pretty decent by the time we get home. Still not sure if he will be able to ride a bike or not, but he will be able to swim. hehehee

I'm gonna be a hermit all weekend, I think. Alekx and the house elf are going diving at the lake again, and last time they went I got to take a trip to the hospital. So...I don't think I'm gonna move out of this house. hehehehe

Holy dull moments batman!!! I just sat here for 15 minutes and can't think of one other dam thing to write about. I guess that would be my cue to post this little boring as all get out post. Hope you all don't fall asleep or wanna go jump out of a basement window cuz I bored you so much.

Happy Thursday everyone.

My Legs Hurt, and I'm Going to Hell

God my legs hurt. Hurt hurt hurtie hurt. I have really been pushing myself hard. Increasing how much I've been walking and upping the water aerobics each week. And my calves have decided they should be in a permanent cramp if I don't keep both my feet flat on the floor at all times. Makes sleeping hard to do, and walking, and dam near anything.
I'm eating banana's each day, and taking some vitamin that Alekx gave me that's supposed to help, but nothing yet. (she probably gave me some pill to make me pass gas more) She's got a cruel sense of humor. She's the type person that would shave a hamster just for shits and giggles. hehehehe

OOooO I have got to tell you all. It sounds like there is a flock of ducks in here every day and they are being tortured. Now we all know men are just gassy all the dam time. I mean, the kiddo farts about 100 times a day. His new thing is to go ahhhhhh (in a whisper) and then announce, "I just pooted" But the house elf, OMG he sounds like he is stepping on ducks. There is constant tortured sounds of "quack, wack, quack" that boys and girls are the sounds of his farts. I mean I thought it was funny as hell that Gigantor (for how big he is) sounds like a squeaky toy. Like when you blow up a balloon and hold the mouth piece out to the side to here it squeak, that is Gigantors. So when he come's out here, we will have squeaking, pooting and quacking ducks. I think I might check myself into a motel during that time. LOL You know this is a gassy house, because the two most favorite sounds the parrot makes is burping and farting, then she laughs afterwards. Just a ton of giggles a minute I tell ya. LOL

Alekx is right, I probably am gonna burn in hell for all the thoughts I have over the young male swim instructors. I mean I don't want to have sex with them or anything, (cuz they are to young, and I'm to tired to teach someone right again) I just want them to all swarm around me, in nothing but their bathing suits, and rub my back, and rub my feet, paint my nails, and clean my house. Ya know. I don't want much, just every woman's fantasy. LOL oOOOooOo they could let me rub my hands over their rock hard abs once in a while too. I would very much enjoy that. hehehehee

I have been missing Gigantor all. It's not about missing sex. (although that would be nice) I just miss hugging and squeezing, and cuddling, and sleeping next to him. We go to the movies and Alekx and house elf give each other kisses, and cuddle, and I feel really really home sick. I am working my butt off here, and enjoying myself, but I really can't wait to go home.

Anywhoo, lunch time for me and the kiddo. Happy Tuesday everyone!!!

Holy Evil Emu's Batman

We went to a wildlife park yesterday. Called Fossil Rim. You can get a bag of food and drive through this park, and the animals come up to your car and eat from you. You are supposed to drop the food on the ground, and they eat it. But some do stick their heads in the car, and some will try to take it from your hands. This was sooooo Amazing for me and kiddo, we truly LOVE animals (cuz they taste really good) no seriously, we do love them. So....we start out and Alekx is driving, and she stops at some ostrich's. They come running up and were eating the food kiddo dropped, well then they seemed a little to interested. Now I've been pecked by a chicken, and a duck and it fricken hurts. There is not a chance I wanted me or the kiddo pecked by the jackhammer size beak of an ostrich. So Alekx finally drives on, cuz this ostrich was sizing up the kiddo to see if his head would take one or two pecks to fully devour. hehehhee Alekx drives us by some Emu's. They are just shorter versions of the ostrich but with sharper claws, and sharper points on their beaks. This one Emu (he was satan people) came up with his red eyes, and kept getting his head in next to me, and looking like he wanted to peck the shit out of me. I'm yelling at kiddo to get to the other side of the car, cuz he had one in his window too, and I'm trying to yell at Alekx to drive, but she thought it was the funniest thing she had ever seen. A pack of wild, rabid, demonic emu's trying to peck her sister and nephew to death. (shhhh don't tell, but I think Alekx is a minion of the underworld people) (she's out to do satan emu's will)

We saw and fed so many things. We saw Axis Deer, European Red Deer, Fallow Deer (so pretty), Silka deer, and Wildabeast. We saw, Waterbuck, Sable Antelope, Greater Kudu, Gemsbok, and Blesbok. We fed Addax, Arabian Oryx, Scimitar Horned Oryx, Aoudad, and Guanaco. The Blackbuck are so beautiful, the males are black with white all around their eyes, really cool. We saw Cranes and Turkeys, and Black Rhino's and Cheetah's. We drove by the Giraffe's and they all wanted to stay in the shade, one was eating, one laying down, and three standing in a line. We sat and got lots of pictures of them, and the herd of zebra's behind them. We thought they were all too hot, and done for the day, when out of the blue one of the zebra's ran right for our car. Then the whole herd came. They just swarmed around the car, sticking their heads in every window. Kiddo was throwing handfuls of food out, and they were nuzzling and letting us pet them. OMG it was the best of the best. Horses are probalby my favoritest animal in the whole wide world. (used to own horses) and to have the most magical of all horses, nuzzling you and letting you pet it was just amazing. It was so cool. I can't even describe what it meant. I'm still flying high from all of that.

As we were leaving Alekx stopped and tried calling over more ostrich's and emu's so they could eat me. I'm telling you people she's a minion, minion I say to the evil giant flightless birds.

Of course the gift shop was over priced, but what the hell it's only money right?? LOL And all kiddo's need stuff from the gift shop. hehehehe

That was our long, tiring, amazingly gratifying day yesterday.

OOoOOo the house elf's brother took us out to eat at a bbq joint called Red, Hot and Blue. It was pretty good. Service could have been better, but the food rocked. LOL

This morning got up early and went to water aerobics. This insane pool here has no stairs, just this steep as can be ramp to get in and out of the pool with. The in part wasn't to bad, but the out part, I could only pull with one arm (can't pull with left, against doc's orders, and elbow still to week) and I was taking baby steps from my ankle. All in all it was good, got my heart rate up, and didn't over do it on the sore joints or limbs. Can't wait till I'm healed and can hit it hard and heavy. LOL

Okay off to make me and kiddo some lunch.

Hugggssss to you all, have a great week.

Funky Friday

I don't know why, but today has seemed funky. Just way way laid back, I haven't been outside, but it seems as if everything is in limbo. Of course that could be all the pain meds talking. hehehehe

Alekx has been helping me get dressed everyday. It's just now starting to where I can tie my shoes, and get my pants on and off. The hardest part is doing the pants, and fastening my dumb bra. I didn't know how much you used and elbow and thumb till this happened. LOL

She also will help me get stuff ready, and I take a shower, then she helps me after word. Well today I slept in so I didn't get up in enough time to get a shower before she left for work. So...I had to have kiddo help me. It's rather humbling to have to have your 9 year old son fasten your bra cuz you can't. LOL Lets hope he doesn't get sucked in. Stupid vortex bra anyway. See what kind of goodies get trapped in it when I go to the movie tonight. hehehehe

Maybe I'll come home with a zebra or giraffe after the wildlife park. My luck only their snotters or poopers. uggghhhh I hate it when I gross myself out.

Something weird since I've been in Texas. When I was home I would crawl into bed and watch about a half hour of t.v. then go to bed. And I always I mean ALWAYS dreamed. I've been here, and I get in bed, have t.v. on, and wake up an hour later with the t.v. still on, so I turn it off, and I don't even fricken dream. I don't even remember being asleep. It's weird.

oOooOOO we watched Texas Chainsaw massacre last night (I had never seen it) Now I'm all freaked out of driving through the tiny po dunk towns in Texas. hell NO LOL That is some weird ass shit, and the case is still open. So old leather face is still out there. ewwwwwwwww ick gag

Okay on that note. I'm gonna go pretend to do something useful. LOL
Happy Friday everyone!!!

Doing better

Well I am doing somewhat better. My ankle is still really sore. Hobbling around with a cane a little bit. My elbow is sore, but my thumb and wrist are what's the worst feeling along with my ankle right now.

I went to a regular doctor yesterday for a follow up. She took that cast like brace off of me, and oh my gosh. I was having some sort of reaction to it. I had this rash, and some blisters on my wrist and hand. She said to keep it off. She got me this brace that goes over my thumb and down the inside of my wrist, and it just velcro's on. She also put me in an arm sling. Told me it would probably be a week or longer I would wear that. Then told me I had to see an orthapedist.

The orthapedist squeezed me in today. He moved my elbow around and checked out my thumb and wrist. He said, I could take the sling off, but just not to straighten my elbow all the way, and not to push up with that arm. So no heavy stuff. He told me to keep wearing the thumb and wrist brace as long as it makes things feel better. He just thought they were bruised deep and on the bone, and sprained. He is gonna see me in 10 days, to recheck everything.

Here is the really good news. He says if I'm gentle on my ankle, and not moving my left arm, I can go ahead and start my water aerobics on Monday. yayyyyyyyyyyy I was so looking forward to that. So now we get to do them. I even bought a new bathing suit and was gonna be pissed if I didn't get to use it. LOL

So...any how just a little update, and I'm sorta typing with two hands right now. So things are looking up. LOL

Looks like we are all going to go see Madagascar tomorrow night, and maybe go out to dinner. Then on Sunday we are going to this wildlife park, that you can drive through and the giraffes and stuff stick their heads right in the car, way cool.

Happy Thursday everyone

Much huuuggggssss your way.

Can anyone say OUCH?????

HOLY FALLING FAT WOMEN BATMAN!!!!!

#1--excuse the typo's i'm typing one handed.

Alekx and the house elf went diving at the lake this past weekend. Me and kiddo stayed at their house. Visited mom, and ate and sight seeing with the house elf's brother and mother (they live down the street and around the corner). Sunday we were gonna go to a bbq at their house and go see mom. Kiddo gets in the car, I walk around the back to get in to drive. Apparently, there is a foot grabbing inch and a half ledge in the concrete. And...of course my foot hit it just right. I twisted my ankle (bad people) (left ankle) hit my right knee, and put my left arm out to break my fall. KABOOOOOMMMM!!!!! Right on my stomach, face down on the concrete. My first thought was "god, I hope nobody saw that" My second thought was "god I hope somebody saw that, cuz I can't get up" I tried to push myself up, only to realize that my ankle was bad, my knee hurt, and my arm was in massive pain. Not like sprained my wrist kind of pain, but like I BROKE MY FUCKING ARM AND CAN'T MOVE IT kind of pain. Thank the lord half the neighborhood was across the street for some reason. They called an ambulance, and went and got house elfs brother. Only thing I don't understand is they called for help, but not one of them came over to check on me. Ass holes. Oh well was nice they called for help. Poor kiddo was scared out of his fricken mind. Praise god house elfs brother was there and took care of him. I got to see the nice inside of Keller's ambulance, and meet two very nice emt's hehehehe Got to the hospital, and got x-rays. I was very sick to my stomach, and the doc says that happens with breaks or other severe bone injuries. (oh great) Doc comes in and goes "good news, your wrist isn't broke, but look at this" shows me the x-ray of my elbow. (feel free to gag here, we all did) my elbow was SEVERELY dislocated. The ball of the joint was out of the socket competely and up on top of it. (here's were all the fun stuff starts) He says we have to put a shot of anesthetic in the elbow joint and get it back in. Then leaves to get the specialist. I then make brother take kiddo out, cuz he didn't have to see that. They bring in this 5 inch long syringe full of stuff and inject it into my elbow joint. OMGGGGGGt hurt so bad. They then had a nurse help hold me, one doc hold my upper arm and the specialist start the torture. let me tell ya people I almost pissed myself. I was moaning and going ooooh ooooh ouch ouch nooooo ouch. Lots of pulling and bending and three pops and one massive SNAP!!!! later. I could move my arm, and I didn't realize I was crying till the doc wiped my eyes. Then the water works really started. I was in a place I didn't know, without my husband, scared my kid beyond reason, and I'm in the hospital. I felt stupid, embarrassed and like a failure. I ended up getting a cast like thing. It's hard and fiberglass, but I can unwrap it for showers.

I can not stress enough how grateful I am to the house elfs brother. I've met the man twice. He stayed at the hospital for 6 hours with me, he left once and took kiddo to get something to eat cuz we missed lunch, he did lots of hugs and reassurance to the boy. He helped me in and out of the car, brought me back, and went and got his mom and the bbq to feed us dinner. They stayed till late till they knew Alekx and the house elf were a few minutes away.

I am so grateful for Alekx and the house elf too. They were so tired when they got in, and they got kiddo in bed and had to both help me up (cuz by this time my ankle was majorly effed up) She has been getting me dressed and helping me to the bathroom and such. She did all the phone calls about the insurance, and set me up with another doctors appt. She took some days off work to help. Yesterday was pure hell, I could barely walk, not to mention the pain in my arm. Today, I'm walking a little better.

Here is what else really sucks. Those water aerobics I really wanted to do. Were supposed to start yesterday. All the other stuff I was gonna work on now has to be postponed. BITES THE BIG ONE!!!!

So thats what has been going on. If I don't post and comment alot, it's cuz this one handed typing sucks ass. took me almost two hours to type this.

Happy whatever day it is!!!!

Here at last

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Well we made it. We are in Texas. Man, three states, two sunburns, one dinosaur museum, one shitty ass service motel, 5 fast food joints, two slaughter houses, one herd of antelope, multiple cows, horses, and squished armadillos and raccoons later. We are finally here.

The trip was long long. But real nice, because I had never seen any of the scenery before. it's odd to go over a bridge and have water in the river or creek. hehehehe Az just doesn't have water like that.

I got two fans in my room going. A giant floor fan that is about to make me deaf on Med, and a little oscillating fan. I'm gonna have a hard time getting used to the humidity. But I think I can do it. Already talked to Gigantor a couple times. We miss each other of course.

Well....I''m way to tired to be witty or snarky, so I am gonna go take some medicine and go to bed. Talk to you all soon. Thanks for all your support.

Happy humping on hump day without me. hehehehee

Last Mad Dash

Okay I'm in my last mad packing dash before leaving for Texas. I have three backpacks full of books, toys and army guys. I have a box full of leggo's small toys, frisbe's and dragons. I have a box full of avon stuff that a bunch of people ordered. (from Texas) I have one duffel bag full of bathroom stuff. I have laundry half way done. I still need to pack some bathroom stuff, medicines, our clothes, and snacks. I AM all in a frazzle, because every fricken time I turn around I realize something I forgot. And it's not like deodorant or something, cuz I can buy those there. It's things like Medications, shoes, and the kiddo's favorite stuffed animals. ahhhhhhhhh That's what is making me panic. I know I can get the clothes and bathroom bag done in like I dunno an hour or so. But I still need to pay bills, and change out my purse, and show Gigantor how to run the virus checks on this.

On a bright note, the bbq went over really great. We had tons of time to visit with friends, the food was awesome, and the kids were, lets see I wouldn't say good, but they didn't murder each other. hehehehe I went and got a manicure today from Goober, and friends showed up again for a few hours, so packing was on hold. We also rented some movies (last movie watching with the hubby) We got Darkness (don't bother) and Son of the Mask (cute but nothing more) Racing Stripes (haven't watched yet) As Good As It Gets (haven't watched yet either) And Gigantor had to get Catwoman again. hehehehee

Now I am on here updating this, and sending mass e-mails out with my new summer e-mail addy. And Gigantor is making sure the packed stuff is stacked in the hallway, and he is changing the bed Alekx will sleep in tomorrow night, and changing our bed, so I can have fresh sheets for a couple nights and fresh pillow cases to take.

I am all butterflies and ucky tummie too. I really need to do this thing for me. I need to get to Texas and get some help with health issues. (or honestly people I'm gonna die) So...that makes me excited. Plus starting some water aerobic classes the Monday after I get there, I'm way way excited. But...people, on the other hand. I really don't want to go. I want to stay here with my husband. It's tearing me the flip up. I know he supports me, and says he'll miss me, and that I am going no matter what (cuz it's for what's best for me) But it's so fricken hard. And if you all think I'm whining, tough shit, it's my blog, I can whine about leaving the love of my life. When we were first married we were separated for 5 months till he got out of the Navy. Ever since then we haven't been apart for more than 4 days at a time. So...this is gonna be really hard. I'm really gonna have a hard time falling asleep I'm sure. I'm torn up, cuz I've been sorta crying a little every time I think about it. And I know I'm gonna cry on Tuesday morning when we leave but on the other hand I really have to do it silently. I don't want kiddo crying and sad. I want him excited about a grand adventure. That kills me most is taking a boy away from his hero for that amount of time. I just hope nobody hates me for it later. Or maybe I shouldn't say hate, but is mad at me and holds it against me for a long time.

Okay fuck that turned into a pity party. Sorry about that. hehehehe I'm done. Gonna go wipe my tears, and break in the clean sheets the right way. (gotta get me all I can before I leave. Gotta get two months worth of nookie in two nights. hehehehe)

Hope you all had a good weekend. Happy Memorial Day everyone. I will try to post tomorrow but no promises. You might not see a post out of me till next weekend, once we get there, and settled in.

Pray for our safe travels please. :)

Suck Ass

Gosh it's been a suck ass day today. It has gotten better toward the end. But it started out bad. hehehehe I got woke up about 6 times through the night from kiddo and gigantor sleep walking and doing stuff. They only get real bad when they are over tired and stressed over something. And the animals are acting weird. I think it's because of everyone trying to adjust to the idea of me and kiddo being gone for over 2 months. Anywhooo since I was woken up so much. I woke up with a full blown raging migrain. My first one in about 4 months or so. Usually I can feel them coming on and take something and they never get that bad. But I woke up with this one. I still took something but it didn't help. I then tripped my way up into the suburban, I banged my shin, bent my finger weird, and konked my head. So that helped the headache alot. hehehe

Got kiddo to school, came home and made some phone calls. One was to Gigantor's friend, D. I was supposed to ask him to come over tomorrow to help with something, and tell him when the bbq started, and ask him to bring soda's. Well....I kept hanging up on his machine after only telling him part of the stuff. So...he got three phone calls cuz I'm a bonehead. He called me tonight, just cracking up at my answering machine abilities.

I tried to get online and read blogs and post this funny story of Gigantor's adventure with the hot sauce yesterday. But my head hurt so very bad, I had to get off, and go lay down. I went in to lay down, and every time I just dozed off the fricken phone would ring. Gigantor, sales man, insurance company, Gigantor again, then the principal of the school. So...no sleep, and headache still there. I got up to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwich with Gigantor for lunch. Now let me tell ya people. I have been eating healthier, but this was bad. We had healthy for ya bread, with sugar free peanut butter, and sugar free jelly. It tasted like we were chewing wet cardboard. gggrrruuuuuugggggg I couldn't even eat it all. OH well, maybe I'll lose weight that way. hehehehee

Have you all ever got a sweaty ass??? I was up sitting in my suburban in the 95 (yeah 95 we are having a cold spell) degree weather, and my ass was all sweaty and wet. The worst thing about that, is I have to go pee every time we come home, so I'm peeling wet sweaty pants off, and then putting them back on. ewwwwwwwww And sweating under your bra is just pure torture too. I don't think I even want to know where you guys sweat. hehehehehe

On the bright side, I was upset and depressed because the kitchen had gotten messy again, after all our cleaning this past weekend. But Gigantor and I got in here and got it cleaned right up. And I got a phone call from two friends tonight, for little chats. So... the day is almost over, but it's starting to look up. After a good night rest, which I hope it is, I should be good to go tomorrow.

Kiddo has a half day tomorrow, so I need to go get money out of the bank for our trip to Texas, cuz the bank isn't open on Monday and we leave early on Tuesday. I also need to do the floors, and cut up all the stuff for piecing together our meal at the bbq on Sat. Since it's for so many people. I wanted to have all the prep work done. We are having bbq chicken leg quarters. They sell the 10lb bags of those here for like 3 bucks. So Gigantor cooks them up (he will do that tomorrow night) then he peals the skin and fat off, and bbq's then on the grill. I'm making some baked beans (semi homemade, adding stuff to canned beans in the crock pot) and I'm making homemade potato salad, and I was gonna cut up watermelon, pineapple, and strawberries in the same bowl. And a friend is bringing chips, and another is bringing soda. So we are good to go. hehehehehe

God I rambled on for having nothing to say. I will try to post about Gigantor's adventure with the hot sauce tomorrow. huuuuuggggsssssssssss

Fun with Bats

Eeek eeeek uck. We were discussing our run in's with bats the other day, and thought I would write them down and share them with you. I mean little bats are a common thing around here. You see them flying in the street lights at night eating all the bugs buzzing around. You can find bat hidey holes in the rock walls where the dam is built. So...all in all they are pretty friendly. Except for these two times. hehehehee

One night Gigantor was out night fishing on "the big pond" (lake Powell people, sheesh) At night him and some buddies have been known to pull in 60lbs of stripers. Anywhoooo he was out night fishing, and he feels this major Yank. So he jerks up to set the hook, only nothing there. Yank Yank, he jerks up again to set the hook, nope nothing there. Then YANK YANK YANK YANK YANK He's like what the hell?? So he starts slowly reeling his line in while the yanking continues. Then his line stops reeling in, and he can't find that it's stuck on the bottom of the lake. He looks up and it looks like he's got a mess of dead leaves at the top of his pole, he thought he just got junk on the line, and it got caught. He goes to brush it off, and it moves. WHAT THE HELL??? he yells. He pulls his pole closer to his face and notices a little bat tangled in his line, and when he reeled it in, he had reeled the poor things little wing in through the top eye hole of the fishing pole. Apparently Mr. Bat, had been skimming the top of the water flying along eating the little bugs that hop along the water. And he flew right across Gigantor's fishing line and got tangled. I mean seriously what are the odds of that?? So....Gigantor the big softy decides he's gonna try to dislodge the poor thing and hope his wing is rubbery enough and okay that he can just fly off. He's talking soft, and gently trying to remove this poor bat, and just when he's almost got it done, the little sucker bit the crap our of him. (insert insane screaming here (BATS=RABIES, BATS=RABIES) ) Okay that was me after I found out that he got bit. hehehehe Anywhoo, Gigantor being the good E.M.T. and outdoorsman that he is, knew he could be in big trouble now, so he packs up, puts the bat in an old box he had, and he drives himself to the hospital. Well at first the doctors are all laughing at him, cuz in walks this GIANT with a little boo boo bite on his thumb. And then Gigantor whips open the box and the doctors starting running and screaming BATSSSS BATSSSSSSSSSS hehehehe So... poor Mr. Bat had to be sent off and tested for rabies, and poor Gigantor had to start undergoing the series of rabies shots. Until the results came back, better safe than sorry. Well the rabies shots are a series of 8 shots over a 6 week period, and they cost a couple hundred bucks a shot. We were told the county could have Mr. Bat tested in a week. Okay that's 2 maybe 3 shots. Well the county drug it's heels, and Gigantor had to get 7 of the 8 shots, before we were told the bat did not have rabies, and we were very lucky. About then I was pissed, cuz they admitted that they could have had the tests in 48 hours of when it was sent in. Needless to say, we didn't pay for one single shot, it ended up being the counties bill. hehehehe

Well our second bat encounter is much more comical. We will never live it down at McDonalds again. About say 3 years ago, we were in our car, and decided to go grab some dinner and mickey dee's. We are in the drive through and the lady goes, "may I help you" right about then, the lady hears "OH SHIT GET OUT GET OUT A BAT!!!!" She's like "excuse me" A mother bunny humping bat flew in our car window and dive bombed me and Giganotor, and tried to fly to the back seat. (kiddo was strapped in back there) Gigantor slapped it down and it hit the floor of the car. I was out of that car like a bullet, and grabbing kiddo as I ran. I think the car seat may have still been strapped to his ass I moved so fast. Gigantor bales out of the car, and is screaming in the drive through speaker, "we need a flashlight, a BAT!!!!" By this time there are like 4 cars behind us, watching us running around freaking out, and McDonald employee's and managers are coming out to see what's wrong. One employee in his infinite wisdom walked up, and hands Gigantor a broom, and leaps back, and goes, "there man, bash it, bash it with the broom" (now bats don't freak me out by any means, I'm actually fascinated by them, but the whole rabies shots, and maybe my son having to go through that had me flipped out) So, Gigantor looks at the broom, looks at the guy and starts laughing. He gives the broom back, and goes "dude I just need to find it and help it out of the car so he can be on his merry way" Gigantor puts on some leather work gloves that happened to be on the dash ( he didn't want bit again either) and right in the drive through proceeds to empty the car, even going as far as lifting all the floor mats. I think he would have taken the seats out, if we let him. We then see something fly up from the growing pile of stuff out of our car that he started. I'm like "there he goes, there there" and Gigantor is like "are you sure" So now I'm second guessing myself. I'm like "ummm maybe???" So..we put the car back together, and realize all 4 cars behind us are not angry but laughing their butts off. The Mc Donalds employees thanked us for the entertainment, and many people said they had never seen a family bale out of a car so fast. All the way home, we continually turned the light on and checked the floor, and moved things, just wondering if the bat was gonna come out and go all mutant vampire on us or something.

I hear some parts of Texas have HUGE bats. I think I'm gonna keep my windows up the whole time I'm there. heheheheeh

Happy batty Wednesday everyone.

Back to Monday

We sure got a lot done around the house this weekend. Just a couple more things to clean up. Gigantor also wants to work on sweeping of the 4000 lbs of sand that's blown up on the cement porch. I swear we scrape the sand with a snow shovel it's so bad, and then we sweep, then the next day there is at least an inch of fricken sand back on the porch.

I also packed up some stuff for going to Texas next Tuesday. I packed up all the playstation games, and some story books, the leap pad, some magazines, and some toys. Another box with a few toys and games in it. A box with my cd player, cd's and kiddo's radio (he has to have music to go to sleep with) Then all I will have to pack is bathroom stuff and clothes. I think it's going pretty good. Trying to decide exactly what we need for the entire summer.

OooOooO over the weekend, we finally got the kiddo working more with his bike. I know I know he's 9 years old and doesn't know how to ride a bike. Not for our lack of trying. We have been trying to teach him how to ride a bike since he was 2 or 3 years old. The kid gets scared then freaks out. Even a month or so ago, he kept getting scared and will start crying and screaming in the middle of the dam street. He did it once this weekend. I took him in the bedroom, and had a big talk to him about how all his friends have been riding since they were 5, and how he is being a quitter, and he was raised better than that. And how he needed to trust his daddy to not let him get hurt, and all the benefits of learning to ride his flippin bike. God I get so angry on how he flips out about some things. Well then he started complaining he needed a bigger bike, which he really does. This one is way small. But dammit both Gigantor and I told him we weren't gonna waste more money on a bike we have bought him two, and if he learns how to ride and will keep up with it, then we would get him a bigger bike. Well this past weekend I was watching his friend J (not big J that's a different friend) and J brought his bike down and was riding it around, and it's a bigger bike. Well...yesterday J's dad came down to pick him up, and was telling Gigantor that we needed to get kiddo a bigger bike, so we told him we wouldn't spend money on one until he learned cuz it would be a waste. A couple hours later, that dad called us back and said, "hey can you afford to buy a bike tube?" we said yes, he told us to come get J's old bike for kiddo. We went and got it, and it's a fricken nice nice bike. It's a 6 speed, got the hand brakes, was nice. Kiddo was all excited going "Oh I would hope it's blue" and we told him to just be thankful that he got a bigger one. Guess what??? It's blue. heheheee I told him since he wanted a bigger, blue bike, and got one that he better dam well make the effort and learn how to ride it. So....now he's more excited. Aunt Alekx even said we could take his bike to Texas with us. yayyyyyyyyyy

Well Gigantor had the smoker fired up again this weekend, and made some jerky. mmmmm mmmmm good. I think I'm gonna go get me piece and go read blogs, then work on packing some more stuff up. (I wanna have everything but my clothes packed before we go so I'm not stressing day before we leave)

Have a happy Monday everyone!!!!

Saturday Madness

Muahhhh hahahahahahaha We all feel a little kookie today. I'm not real sure why. Like that real excited feeling you get when your gonna go do something your really anticipating. It's been a house of fun around here today. We actually have been working quite hard on cleaning up the house. Having a bunch of people over for a bbq next weekend. What a motivator to get your pig sty raked out. hehehehe

We went and watched Revenge of the Sith today. OMG it was awesome!!!!! Explained everything!!! Anything you had questions of from the long ago movies was explained. But then again we love the star wars movies, all of them.

We came home and did some more cleaning up, and I filled out "congratulations" cards and checks for the nieces and nephews that are graduating this year. Only two this year thank god.

Now I am getting ready to slave over dinner. I'm sure I'll build up quite a sweat hovering over that hot phone while I dial the pizza place. hehehehe I am watching one of the kiddo's friends from yesterday after school until tomorrow sometime. So now I got two kids I can beat on. hehehehe

Okay off to eat some pizza and watch a Hercules movie we recorded last week.

Happy Saturday everyone!!!!

Hotter than........

.....a gringo's ass after eatin mexican buffet. hehehehe Okay it is officially hot hot hot here. Arizona is having heat advisories, and record breaking heat all over the state for the next week or so. It's been 100 degree's here. That's hot for my little po dunk town. And in Arizona it's not just hot, it's the dry, cook your brain kind of hot. You know when you step outside and you can hear your brain sizzling like a fried egg. Where you can get third degree burns opening your car door. That kind of hot. I love Arizona, I really really do. I'm just not fond of the 100 degree weather for a couple months each year. I sit inside directly in front of the a/c vent. Children don't play outside till after the sun goes down. It's impossible to dress up and stay looking nice and cool if you have to step outside for longer than 28.3 seconds. I kid you not. Your makeup melts off, you have sweat all over, underarm wing, and your hair will be wet. Not to mention even if you wear perfume, you then begin to smell, and it only get's worse through the day. I think all us Arizonan's are used to each other. hehehehe

Here are a few reasons I'm not fond of the hot hot hottadie hot heat. First of all, I swell up in the heat. My feet, ankles, my fingers, hands and wrists, just my entire body. I look and feel like "Bloat" that blowfish in finding nemo.. POOF uht oh Second, I own shorts and capri pants, but will only wear them around the house. For two reasons. I have that lower extremity Lymphodema, my lower legs are huge with the swelling in them. So part of it is that I'm to self conscious to show my legs, but also I'm really afraid to get them sun burned, so I wear long pants even in the summer. Also I can't wear the cute little sandals or thongs, or go bare foot, because with my leg problems if I'm not securely strapped into a closed toe shoe, my feet and ankles swell to the point I can't walk. So...I wear socks and tennies all summer too. I do wear way baggy sleeveless henly t-shirts. Even though my bye bye arm shows. (you know that under side of your upper arm that when you raise your arm to wave at someone it waves also. "bye bye") I will put up with that showing, but not with what shows in my spaghetti strap tops. I wear spaghetti strap tank tops around the house, but since they are snug, I won't wear them out, cuz I look like the Michelin Man. hehehehee One other thing I hate about the hot summers in Arizona, is how much you sweat. You sweat out of every single pore of your body. Even between your fingers and toes, behind your ears, and in your belly button. And when you sweat in Arizona, after you go back in side and cool down and dry off, you then look like you have been dunked in McDonalds french fry frier. You look all greasy, your hair, face, skin. Looks like you rolled around in oil. It's gross I tell ya. hehehehe

Anyhow enough bitching. I almost dread going out to go pick up the kiddo. It's 2:30 when I go, right getting in the high point of the day in Arizona. I should be all sweaty and cranky when I get home. Gosh I don't know how hot it is in Texas where Alekx lives. I wonder if the humidity is gonna kill us. Scary thoughts.

Well I think I am gonna take the kiddo to the movie for tomorrow's matinee. It's Star Wars Revenge of the Sith. Hope he isn't bored out of his skull, hope it has some good action in it.

Happy Friday every one. Stay Cool, and stay hydrated!!!!!

Lookie Who's Here!!!!!

Okay just something real quick since I posted earlier today. The friend I always talk about in my blogs, Goober, well she finally got a blog!!! yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy

So everyone go welcome the goof ball Goober

Go ahead I dare you. You can even tell her I sent you. hehehehe

Missed Me???

Did ya miss me??? huh huh huh did ya?? I haven't posted in what?? 4 days?? *gasp*

Well as I mentioned before we had kiddo's party on Saturday. On Sunday, kiddo and I woke up with of all things, sun stroke. To much sun, to little water, not a good combination in Az. So we both felt sick and icky and pukey, and headaches. We sat around watching movies guzzling water and chewing on ibuprophen. Felt much better the next day.

On Monday the kiddo went on a field trip to Antelope Canyon We live about a mile or two away from that. I used to go out there when I had my horses, and goof off out there. The pictures just don't do them justice. It's a wonder of God I tell you. Amazing.

On Tuesday kiddo had his track meet. It was cute. He was in the softball throw. He fell about in the middle of the pack. There were over 20 kids doing the softball throw, and only about 6 or so threw better than him. They got 3 throws each. There was this one little girl that was only about half the size of kiddo. OMG could she fricken throw. She out did all the boys. Oh well. Kiddo did want to do one of the running competitions, but the p.e. teacher wouldn't let the kids pick what they wanted to do this year. She picked. I'm starting to get ticked off though. Yes my kid isn't the fastest runner, but he has done the softball throw in each track meet since kindergarten. It's about time to let him fricken do a relay race or something. If I get a thing saying he's in the softball throw next year, I'm gonna go beat some heads in. hehehehe

Today is nothing much going on, but tomorrow kiddo has a field trip to a place called Escalante Staircase They are gonna be busy all day. They can go to the old movie set, go sight seeing, go to two visitor centers, go see petrified wood, and go fossil hunting for trilobites and stuff. I think he's gonna have a blast. Need to make sure I pack his really big bottle of water to go with him.

On Friday I am picking up one of his friends after school and keeping him till Sunday morning. His parents have to take his big sister out of town for something (I'm not sure, I didn't ask) So...I volunteered since kiddo isn't gonna get to play with his friends this summer. Then next weekend, I want to have Goober, her hubby, big J and little pixie over for a bbq. Like a last get together before we leave for Texas. I'm hoping we can get in, I wanna take me, Gigantor, kiddo, and friend to go see star wars on Saturday. hehehehe

Okay everyone the need to pee is winning out over thinking of some other smart ass thing to say. I'm all out of smart assie ness for a while. I need to rekindle my bullshitter I think. hehehehe So, I'm gonna go hold court on my throne. Happy Wednesday everyone!!!!

Where's the Duct Tape

I think that is what I wanted to scream at the kiddo's party today. hehehehe We woke up to someone knocking on the fricken door, at 7 this morning. WTF??? It's a weekend. It was one of the guys from Gigantor's work wanting his wives Avon. I think he got the clue when they said they could hear me screaming from the bedroom about how NOBODY better disturb us before 9 on a fricken weekend day!!! Anyhow we got up to get something to eat so we could head out and get the cake and soda for kiddo's party. That's when we realized we had no milk, or bread for toast. hmmmm Gigantor went and got us a breakfast meal from the little family owned takeout restaurant, just to find out they decided they aren't gonna serve breakfast anymore after Monday. grrrrrr We then went up to get the cake. We have had lots of problems with the bakery about this cake, to where I had to call and bitch out two managers. I was told there would be no problem. It would be ready at 9. Well...kiddo had ordered a Yu-Gi-Oh cake. When we got their they claimed they couldn't read that, and they made him a "Thomas the Train" cake instead. I was mother effin livid. I was so pissed I couldn't even see straight. Gigantor told me he would handle it. So I went to the car before I started hurting people. Well 9:45 Gigantor comes out with the right cake. And he says he paid for it. EXCUSE ME????!!!! I DON'T EFFIN THINK SO!!!! But he made me leave without causing a stink cuz we needed to do the kiddo's birthday and we were running a little late. So...he tells me that the lady was very very nice and apologetic. But...the more I got thinking about it the madder I got. Because I had given them both my phone numbers and they had them written down. If they couldn't figure it out, they should have fucking called me!!! Right??? So...I tried calling but neither of the managers I talked to before were there, so I'm gonna call back tomorrow and the next day and the next till I get them. Pisses me off.

Any how, we got to the park, and carried all the stuff over under some trees, and it was a nice high cloud cover today. The kids started showing up. Gigantor played with the foxtail ball toys we have and with footballs we had. I think Gigantor played more and listened less than any of the kids. He came home with grass stains on his knees, butt, back, and head. The dork ass. I on the other had leisurely sat at the picnic table with some other mom's and watched over the cake and ice chest. hehehehe

One of my very goodest friends showed up, (Goober) whose son (Big J) is kiddo's best friend, also his sister (Little Pixie) Well...a few days ago Goober asked kiddo what he wanted for his birthday. And kiddo says "a million bucks" And Goober says "okay I'll see what I can do" So....kiddo is opening presents. He's getting things like bionicles, play station games (thank you so much Julie bizrate was the bomb) water guns, Yu-Gi-Oh cards, dragons toys, and star wars stuff. He opens the package from Goober. In it is play money in the sum of one million bucks. hehehehee Nobody else got it, but Goober, kiddo, big J, little Pixie and I were cracking up.

I guess through all this party the suns rays were coming through the clouds ( I should know this shit people I've lived in Arizona all my life, and you can litterly fry your skin in a matter of a half hour) So...when I got home I realized I was sunburnt. Only not all over, just on my head, face, and neck. I don't think "mom that's nuts" vinegar and water bath is gonna help. I don't care, I can not hold my breath that long to dunk my head and neck in the water. hehehehe So...I'm gonna suffer and peel, yes that icky peeling, that kiddo loves so much to pick off me. My darling son will fall over himself to get to me and pick my peeling skin. It's a compulsion or something. Why he can't have a compulsion of giving me a back rub, or lotioning my feet, or cleaning the house, I just don't know. But, noOoOOoOo it has to be picking at my peeling flakey skin. hehehehe

Well we came home after the party and rested, and got hamburgers for dinner and watched the Limeny Snicket movie that kiddo got. It was good. I was surprised. I have never read the books. Gigantor also rented "Meet the Fockers" so we will watch that tomorrow.

Oh oh oh oh here is a challenge for you. Do any of you all remember that game you played with the football called "smear the queer" ?? It's where whoever has the football everyone else tries to tackle them, and they only get rid of the ball at the last minute. Well...I guess that name isn't "politically correct" anymore, and the kids aren't allowed to say it. So...we spent the better part of a morning trying to think of a good name. And we came up with nothing. Only thing one of the mom's could come up with is "get the guy with the football" I know I know pathetic. I was trying to find clean rhymes with smear the _____ or cream the ______ or slam the _____ But I have nothing. Anybody got any good ideas????

Hope you all had a great Saturday!!!!!

Holy cow I just realized today is Friday the 13th. hhehehehe Sorry I haven't posted in a few days. I really had nothing, not a dam thing, to say. I mean I guess I could have told you about the first night with my toe all bandaged. The giant cat we have literally POUNCED in the middle of the night on it. Then he wouldn't get his fat ass off, he just sat there chewing on my toe. So...I'm screaming in pain and wake Gigantor up and I'm yelling "GET YOUR FUCKING CAT OFF MY FOOT" So, Gigantor is still mainly asleep, and he starts slapping at the cat, and all he does is smack my foot and toe about 10 times. I was so frozen in pain. I yell at him, made him throw the cat out. Then I was so bad. I told him it was time for work, and he could get up now. He still could have slept an extra half hour or so. But I was so done with both of them. hehehehe

I also had to run up to the hospital on Wed. My friend from Phoenix called and her dad had been taken into the hospital here, and they were gonna fly him out. And her mom (who is like a 2nd mom to me) was up there all alone. So..Gigantor and I went up there for a while.

I've been dinking around, and now I'm down to the last day before the kiddo's party to get shit done. I was gonna have all the goody bags for the kids and all the presents wrapped before now. But...noooOOoOoo it never seems to work that way. So...I'm gonna be wrapping after he goes to bed tonight.

Only two weeks of school left. And next week kiddo has a track meet and two field trips. So that should be fun. Gigantor is gonna take a half day off so he can go with me to the track meet.

Only two weeks, then Alekx will be here to pick me and kiddo up. To take us to Texas for the summer.

TOE--tally disgusting

Today was my great toe adventure. hehehehe Okay so I'm still loopy from my happy pill, and I feel ready to pass out. (which I'm gonna go do after I write this)

I woke up this morning with my tummy all in knots, cuz I was nervous about getting my toenail taken off. And Gigantor fed me a happy pill (valuim) And by the time we got to the clinic. I was tired. I then was walking into things....the door, the scale, Gigantor, the table. For the life of me, I could not walk a straight line. I was not near as nervous after my happy pill, and my tummy wasn't queasy anymore. So...doc gives me the nerve block shot. Like 10mils of the stuff. And he goes, "Can you feel this?" I say "yup" He says "Lets check" and he uses those monster nippers. SNIP I yell "OUCH I said I could feel that" So...doc gives me a bunch more numbing/nerve blocker stuff. He then starts snipping again. I start whining. "oooowwww I can still feel that" He says "bad" I said "pretty uncomfortable" He says "bad enough to kick me in the face?" I say "probably not, but you'll be the first to know" hehehehe He said to breath and let him hurry. So...took a little over a minute by that point. And I could feel everything in the quick. The nerve block did great everywhere except the quick. He then put this huge tube like bandage on my toe, says it has to stay on for 24 hours. My happy pill has had some weird effects the few hours after I took it. It's made me dizzy, little sick to my tummy, and just feeling like a drunk idiot. Gigantor is laughing at me, cuz my words are slurred, and I'm making so many typo's, it's probably taken all morning to write this.

So...anywhoo, he prescribed some other magic pills (lortab) So..while the happy pill is still in effect and my toe is starting to throb very very bad. I'm gonna go lay down. OOoOOoO on the major sweet side. Gigantor took the day off to be with me. To go get kiddo and do homework after school, and to keep an eye on me. I have so many allergies and weird reactions to medication that he doesn't want me to slip into a coma or anything. LOL

Happy Toe--sday everyone!!!

har har har

Mothers Day

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL!!!!!!!!!!!

I sit here and think about my mother. I sit and think about the sacrifices she made for me and Alekx. How she was an uneducated and single mother when I was 6 and Alekx 13. How she took on many part time jobs. And lied her way into her first full time job. How she put her life on hold to provide for us. How many a night she went hungry with only a piece of bread and butter, so that Alekx and I would have full bellies. How no matter how hard she worked, she came to every play, and performance either of us did. How she taught 4-H just to be closer to me. And how she helped me achieve some of my dreams. How she helped both of us plan our weddings, loving every minute of it. Then stayed slightly in the background so we could be the center and enjoy our day. How, even though she is deathly afraid of heights, she flew in a rickety little plain when I got air vacced out, because she was not going to miss it if I drew my last breath. How she stayed by my side, and fought with medical personal to make sure I would live. How she even bought me the wrong size boots. hehehee How she wept so hard when I was told I could never have children. When she cried with me and Gigantor so much harder through all the heart ache of years of fertility drugs. How she about passed out crying and laughing when we found out I was finally pregnant. How she was the rock for Gigantor and I to lean on when we were told it was probably a tubal, and we would have to abort it. When she said I told you so, when we found out that the kiddo was not a tubal. How she drove over 2 hours at 3 in the morning to be to the hospital in time for the kiddo to be born. How after the moment he was born she stepped back into a corner and cried just watching me, Gigantor and the kiddo bonding in our first few minutes of having a family. How she has been a presence for every single aspect of kiddo's life. How she finally learned to say I love you to me and Alekx. Then her health fell apart, and things became strained. And it was harder to find reasons to be so thankful. Because the immediate strain and stress were so much. I now sit and think about how grateful I am that she is going to be around a while longer. How Alexk and I wept and were frightened a great deal back in January. How when she came out of sedation she cried and cried when she saw us. How she refused to let go of our hands, and begged us not to leave her. How she now says "I love you" every day, instead of once in a while. How she weeps over missing us, and what she's put all of us through.

My mother was not the greatest mother. She wasn't even close. But my mother did the best she could, and some of the things she did. Were truly amazing. We are here to learn from our parents trials, to learn from what they did good, and what mistakes they made. Our job is to not repeat their mistakes, and try to do even better with the next generation.

I am grateful for my mother for everything she is, and everything she isn't. For it has shaped me into what and who I am today. Without her exactly how she is, there would be no me, and without me, there would be no Kiddo. For this I will always thank God!!

May you all have a happy mothers day. Tell your mother what she means to you today. And be grateful, for without them, there is no you.

For everyone that is a mother. GOD BLESS YOU!!! We are molding the next generation. May we do as good a job as possible!!

Freaky Friday

Not really, just couldn't come up with a better title. hehehehe

Okay my toe must be mocking me now. It hasn't really hurt for a few weeks, and after the doc says they gotta take the nail off, it starts hurting and oozing gunk. blllaaaaahhhhh Now I'm greatly anticipating it being taken care of.

Since I had to reschedule the birthday party for kiddo I have had 3 responses of people who WILL be there. Things are looking up. hehehehe

My husband has me on smoker duty without even asking me grrrrrr. He got an electric smoker from his dad, and cleaned it all up, and has just been waiting to smoke something. So...he pulled some short ribs out of the freezer yesterday. Puts them in the smoker this morning. Then he comes and wakes me up at 5 in the morning. Informing that that if it stops smoking, I need to take the pan out and dump the ashes around the tree and put more wood chips in it. I groogly, and crankily say. "ain't gonna happen, piss off, I'm sleeping" then he left. But I'm a sucker so I realized it wasn't smoking when I came back from dropping kiddo off. So...I ate breakfast grumbling and then went out and changed the wood.

Nothing exciting has happened lately. Just same old stuff.

Anybody ever feel like your in a pit of tar or quicksand, and you are very very slowly sinking and nobody will help pull you out??? NO??? Maybe it's just me. I'll get out of my funk soon.

Happy Friday everyone!!!!!

What is Wrong With People???!!!!

I just had to rant about this, it made so mad I wanted to hurt this woman. I was listening to the news. I missed what city this was in. But a woman was arrested for spraying and saturating a 2 month old baby with pepper spray. The baby is still in the hospital recuperating. THE DUMB ASS WOMAN CLAIMS IT WAS SELF DEFENSE!!!!

What the fuckidy fuck fuck fuck???!!! Are there mutant 2 month old babies running around threatening our safety??? How the fuck can that be self defense. Somebody needs to torture her dumb butt for a few days.

Okay sorry had to yell about that.

What a Cluster F*@#

Okay okay I got the call today and I go in on Tuesday to get my toe poked, prodded, sliced and diced. Happy now??? I'm sure it will feel lots better in about a week or so, but dammit all anyway.

So.... Kiddo's birthday is Sunday. And since it's mothers day, I wanted to throw his party on Saturday the 7th. I talked to a bunch of his friends mom's and they all said that would be great, but could I do it before noon. So I set it up for 10:30 till noon. I got goodie bags ready, ordered a cake, and did up 12 invitations. Kiddo delivers them, and about 6 of the kids right away said they couldn't make it. I was like WTF??? So kiddo comes out of school today, all depressed and almost crying. Everyone but 2 kids said they couldn't come. What the FUCK!!!!????? I talked the the fucking mom's already. So...I felt for my poor precious baby, and I was sorta ticked off. I then went to three of the mom's who were picking up their kids. And they informed me that all of them forgot there was a pine box derby in Phoenix for boy scouts that weekend. So they were all going. (my son is not in boy scouts here. It's run mainly by the mormon church, and we are not mormon. I could put him in the non mormon unit of it, but there is hardly anyone in that one) So I then go to those mom's and a few more and say "if it's next weekend, will your kids come" I was told yes. Lets hope so. So...I just rescheduled the cake, and did a print out on the computer telling everyone it was rescheduled. Now poor kiddo has to go pass all those out. And hope and pray that some of these little shit heads show up. I really feel for the kiddo being such a loner and only having one or two "good" friends. It starts turning into such a social standing game around this age. It's awful, it's ugly and I hate it. Okay that's a whole other rant, and I'm not gonna go into it now. I told the kiddo I would give him a couple of his small gifts, and have a family friend over for dinner, and bake a cake, then he can have his big party next weekend. He's so sweet. He goes. "okay, thank you mommy" although he still sounded rather upset and depressed. I really feel for him. If the other kids don't show up next weekend. I'm gonna go stink bomb some fucking houses. hehehehe

I'm gonna end it here, cuz I just keep pissing myself off more. hehehee

Oh and it was 82 flippin degree's here. It was in it's 60's yesterday now it's 82. Fuck a big assed, web footed, crooked beaked, floppy winged, yellow duck!! That's a big jump.

Happy Happy whatever everyone. hehehehe

Doctor Day

I had to go get my well woman check yesterday. Oh what fun to go get poked, pinched, prodded, pulled, scraped, brushed, sliced, diced and violated every year. All this so I can just get my fricken prescriptions filled for the year. Yayyyyyyy NOT!! So I'm sitting there with nothing NOTHING on but my socks and the remanants of a paper gown. (that had to open in the front people) And Gigantor tattles on me (the fuck nut) He tells the doctor to look at my toe. I'm like "shut up fuck nut" The doctor was choking around laughter. So they wrestle me out of my sock and the doctor goes "OOoOoOhhhhhhhh NO" Great!!! Stupid tattle tale Gigantor. grrrrrrrrrr

Anywhoo, let me tell you about my toe. Back in January, before mom got sick. I had a hang nail that I pulled out from the side that was in the quick. (big toe people) And it got sorta infected. Well Gigantor took it upon himself to squeeze the shit out of it every day. He put some medicine on it to "suck" out the infection. Well the following day, I had all this fresh raw tissue poking up through the wound. Over the course of the week and a half we were in Phoenix with mom, it got worse and worse. I could barely walk. And I had this abscess of tissue up over half of my toe nail, and it was red and full of nerves and infection. Since then it has gone down some, not all, but some. I figure it will either heal eventually or my toe would fall off. Either way I was good. Like I said, Gigantor the fuck nut, tattled on me. And the doctor informed me that I had an ingrown toe nail. I said "so" He starts chuckling, and goes. "That nail is gonna have to come off, and we get you on antibiotics." OH FUCK NOOOOO!!! I said, "nope I'm good, ain't nobody prying my toe nail off" He says "we'll numb it first with shots" OH HELL NO I AIN'T GETTING SHOTS IN MY TOE!!! I complain and hem and haw, and almost cry. (people I have a phobia about stuff near or in my eyes and a phobia about shit with nails. Gives me the weebie jeebies so bad that I'm ill) He tells me I can show up passing out drunk if I want, or I can self medicate if I want. I'm still all "nope, ain't gonna happen" He then tells me that I'm pushing a real danger zone to have infection that has been in there for over 4 months and if I don't get it done right away that I won't be able to do the stuff I want to do this summer to work on my health. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr and double grrrrrrrrrrrrr

His nurse is calling me tomorrow to get me in either Friday or Tuesday. I think I'm gonna continually throw up and pass out till it's all over with. He did prescribe me two little "happy pills" to take before getting it done. hehehehe

Okay Happy Tuesday everyone, and may all your toes stay in tact.

Oh and squeak squeak squeak

A Day at the Carnival

So kiddo and his friend J got to go to the carnival this weekend. Always a little fun in the small town. Anywhoo my son is way way afraid of heights, and nobody knows why. I mean he got on the carousel for Christ sake, and he got up on the horse on it, and freaked out, so he got down onto one of the bench seats on it. And rode it. He went through all the fun houses like 10 times. (we got them the bracelet for 15 bucks, and it's unlimited rides) Well his friend, J, has no fear. So...he was going on stuff like the Hammer, and Sizzler and stuff like that. Finally Gigantor has this talk with the kiddo about how he needs to try more stuff, and stop being afraid. Well...J's sister who is 14 walks up and starts talking to him too. And kiddo decides to go on a couple rides with her. He goes on the Pharaoh's Fury. It's this giant boat on this swing thing. So he goes on that, and says it's fun. Then he decides to go on something called the Kamakazi. They strap you in this airplane looking thing, so you are laying on your belly. And then they start spinning it and tilting it, and it goes up and down. Well kiddo gets off of that, and screams " that was RIGHTEOUS!!!!!!" Then starts going OMG the horse on the carousel is WEEK compared to this. So he marched back to the carousel and rode the horse. hehehehehe

Well...Kiddo and Gigantor wanted to try the strong man thing. You know where you hit the thing with the sledge hammer and the thing moves up and hits the bell. Well...kiddo can barely get the sledge hammer in his hand. But he gives a valiant effort. Well for a prize he got this blow up sledge hammer. It's real big like 4ft tall, and the head of it is the size of a medium watermelon. So it's real light, all blow up, and when you hit something with it it has this loud "squeak". The kiddo and Gigantor were waiting for J to get off the Sizzler, and Gigantor is kneeling in the dirt talking to kiddo. There was this little old lady (like in her 60's) that is walking around with a blow up hammer too. So everyone is sorta smiling thinking about her trying the strong man game. And she comes up to kiddo and jumps in front of him in this defensive position. She then yells "HAMMER FIGHT!!!" and bonks him on the top of the head with a loud SQUEAK and jumps back in this defensive positions. Well....my precious baby boy. Takes off beating the hell out of this old lady. He chases her half way down the fairway beating her ass. "squeak squeak squeak" Gigantor is yelling at him to come back. Bystanders see this 60+ year old lady streaking past them (and dayum she could run fast) and this 8 year old boy chasing her "squeak squeak squeak" beating her with his hammer. She finally yells "okay okay I give!!" and the kiddo turns around to start walking back all proud of himself. Gigantor is like yelling "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING??" Kiddo matter of factly goes "Well she started it!!!" Everyone around starts dying laughing. I mean I almost peed my pants. He was right too, she did start it. But I can't get over my son chasing some old lady down a fairway beating her ass with a squeaky hammer.

Well that was the adventure at the carnival this weekend. Hope everyone has a great Monday.

SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK